[NLD]Xì ta gua= hài nhũn não

Luật nào thế

 

méo nhớ rõ nhưng hình như thằng anakin ko đưa mẹ nó thoát khỏi cảnh nô lệ dc để rồi chết thảm cũng vì cái luật này thì phải

 

Có mỗi chú Anakin là xứng đáng chúa tể bóng tối thôi, thằng cháu vớ vẩn cố làm ra vẻ ngầu nhưng chỉ là cục shit xàm xí với anh .

 

Thằng Kylo Ren còn không xứng đáng làm kẻ ác chứ đừng nói là chúa tể bóng tối, từ ngoại hình cho đến tính cách. Tính ra còn thua thằng Darth Maul hay thậm chí cả Grievous chứ đừng nói đến Anakin

 

Anakin tha hóa nhưng do cái hội đồng Jedi củ hạch + bản thân hướng thiện nhưng lầm lạc sa ngã (cái kiểu này phim Tào nhiều) nên vẫn ngầu hơn. Emoboy lại kiểu emo + cool của mấy đứa nhóc con

 

Thằng Rian đạo diễn mới phá banh chành h nhìn lại thấy JJA có cố gắng

 

Thì rõ JJA cố gắng cân bằng cũ và mới, vừa kéo đc fan SW cũ bấm bụng đi xem vừa để khán giả mới tiếp nhận. Đến Rian mới chổng mông vào mặt fan và khán giả. Đám khán giả phổ thông và critics bị đầu độc bằng mấy tình tiết công chúa rởm với twist ngu học thì tích cực lick Rian's ass.

 

A review of the Original Trilogy, by a Modern Star Wars Fan.
u/jmarFTL
So I just got back from the Original Trilogy and hoo boy, what a big piece of shit. I can't express how disappointed I am in these films that are full of plot holes.

First of all, there is just a ridiculous amount of cringy humor all over these movies, and they undercut seriousmoments. I mean, Han Solo saying "boring conversation anyways" when he shoots the intercom? They're in mortal danger, they have the entire base after them! And huge moments like the first time they finally rescue the princess they've been trying to rescue the whole movie and the first words out of her mouth is "aren't you a little short for a stormtrooper?" Not to mention in every single scene where they're supposed to be in danger, C-3PO is piping up with jokes as the stupid "comic relief."

Then Luke is supposed to be finding this great Jedi master, right, and it turns out it's a fucking puppet in a swamp who sounds like a goddamn Muppet and who just makes jokes all the time! He seems more interested in his food then teaching him the ways of the Force! These are supposed to be serious scenes in a seriousfilm and instead they just want to joke, joke, joke. Ugh, just cringe everywhere.

Secondly, do they plan on explaining anything? I mean, OK, we've got the Rebels and the Empire. The Rebels are good because they say they're good and the Empire is bad because they say they're bad. That's great. How about explaining how the Empire came to be? Why the Rebels started fighting? None of this is ever explained over literally three movies. And the main villain, the guy who is obviously a big fucking deal, they never even tell you where he came from? He's just Emperor Palpatine and he's the Emperor because he's the Emperor. Uh, how about explaining how he became Emperor and how he became so powerful in the dark side of the Force? I mean, hello? He's the main bad guy! Seriously, they kill him and never explain who he is or where he came from. I guess now we'll never know.

I mean seriously, it feels like these could use three more films explaining all the shit that they didn't explain in these. I'd watch those, there's no way they could be bad.

Third, these films have no respect for canon. OK, so at the beginning of Empire Strikes Back, Luke is hanging upside down in a wampa cave. And he just reaches out and conveniently the lightsaber just flies into his hand? WTF? It hadn't been established that the Force can do this! Even Obi-Wan didn't do that, and Luke, who hasn't had a lick of actual training, is able to do it first try? Give me a fucking break with this bullshit.

Oh, speaking of Obi-Wan, they build him up in the entire first movie to be this badass, hell he even trained Luke's father supposedly. You know that he's one of the greatest Jedi (whatever a Jedi is, they don't even really explain that, LOL), and you're all ready for him to fuck some shit up. And he - get this - he turns his fucking lightsaber off rather than just fuck this dude up. He lets himself die. They seriously make Obi-Wan into a bitch, dude. I wanted to see him be a badass.

They just throw in twists for the sake of twists. It's like, Vader is Luke's dad, even though Obi-Wan explicitly said Vader killed his dad. Also Leia is Luke's sister? So like, Darth Vader was arresting his own daugher in ANH? They don't even have the same last name! I thought when Yoda said there was another it was gonna be Han Solo, they just shit all over the fan theories.

Then, get this, they destroy the Death Star, you know, the big goddamn base, at the end of the first one, and in the second one the Empire is just conveniently back with no explanation whatsoever? Again, how the hell did they get so powerful? You destroyed their main base and they just show up again like nothing happened!

And that doesn't even get into the ridiculous plot holes throughout the movies. The Empire apparently actually leaked the plans to the second Death Star to the Rebels on purpose so that the Rebels would show up and be slaughtered. But the Rebels end up destroying the Death Star anyways. So why would you give them the actual plans? Why not give them fake plans so even if they survived the trap somehow, they couldn't blow up the Death Star. Also, if the key to the Death Star is the shields, why would you leave like just a couple guys at the base down on Endor? That's the key to the whole thing!

Jabba, just push them off the skiff into the sarlaac! Better yet, just tie them up and shoot them and then there's no chance for them to escape! Tarkin, stop delaying and just fire the Death Star! It took Alderaan out in like two seconds, why does it take a damn year to power up now? It's just awful, everyone acts illogically the whole time.

Christ. You know, I just want to go to the movies to have fun. It's never happened once in my life, but I am sure someone out there will be able to do it. But it's not these movies, that's for damn sure. Avoid these big steaming turds at all costs.

Sincerely,

Modern Star Wars Fan

 

Savage as hell

 

Let the past die. Kill it, if you have to.
This is not going to go the way you think.

 

"I hate sand"

Spoiler

Phần này kylo tự tay giết snoke đúng bài rule of 2 rồi còn gì

 

Tâm huyết vậy, like cái lúc rảnh đọc sau

 

công nhận cái hình thằng vader lúc chưa mặc giáp nà nhìn xấu vkl, trước xem phần 1 thấy nó đi theo cái thuyền gì của bọn thám hiểm vũ trụ thấy hay xong về sau mặc bộ giáp đen thui vào rồi gây chiến lung tung xem chán bỏ mẹ

Spoiler

đừng giết tao

 

Hopeless War Against the Rat

 

Ahihi

 

do anakin đẹp trai mặt ngầu thôi chứ có cmg đâu mà phải giải thích nhiều

 

#JarJarRose