Silent tears of the poet

Thảo luận trong 'Giao lưu Ngoại Ngữ' bắt đầu bởi logean, 8/12/07.

  1. RATField

    RATField Fire in the hole! GVN Veteran

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    Sigh...I am now being in hard time, and very desperate that could commit suicide...just that I can not, die yet. I would stand until my body perish, my soul's penetrated.

    The Fallen Warrior

    I the loner wolf, I the killing warlord
    Standing in the darkness with no fear
    See through all thingies as lives falling down
    I the Lord of All.

    I the Unbeatable, I the glory champion
    Fighting in the dead and living
    Slash through all till no one 's still alive
    May God scare me.

    You the sacred Angel, shining to my eyes
    Charmed me the full love with no end
    Know through my thoughts as I come forth
    You, I love you.

    I the fighter of might, made the way to you
    Love you till the end, hold you tight
    Confess you to deepest of my heart
    You would love me.

    You the shining love, bless me till the end
    Masked you face in light with no shame
    Guided me to the dead end as I falling down
    I the true loser.

    You the one who lie, blind me with the light
    Always I was in darkness with no love
    See through all but not the light you gave me all
    I the dead one.

    I the one flying, in the cool night sky
    Wishing you'll be happy with no lie
    Free from all chains as my life fading to darkness
    Shall one bestows me.

    The last moment I see you, my back's hurt
    Thrusting through my heart, the hidden blade
    You yourself did it, then throw me to the free sky
    You the last winner.

    I never know what love you gave to me,
    How can I keep living when you has betrayed my love
    I only know that I am not in your heart,
    Just a dummy in place of your old love.

    Oh the fool me, I am dead already
    But I love you till the end, don't you know
    I will keep on loving you, just when I see your light
    I know that's no lies

    But the later light...
    You've changed, ain't you
    You are not the one I've seen before
    I the Fallen Warrior

    Shall I bless you...

    That's it, oh ho, my heart's broken so badly now.
     
  2. Kanone

    Kanone Mario & Luigi

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    oh I got it
    The thing you are talking about is assonances.
    :hug:.That's great.We can share knowledges.
    http://www.tnellen.com/cybereng/lit_terms/assonance.html
    http://www.tnellen.com/cybereng/lit_terms/consonance.html
    :hug:now I got the rules
    I'm gonna write one poem tomorrow.^^
    thx u a lot
    how can u know about writing poem?
    Is that one part of our education system in Vietnam?
    or it is your interest?
     
  3. RATField

    RATField Fire in the hole! GVN Veteran

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    @ to logean : I said, and that's what I said. I will try to write a song soon...or a new poem?

    Whatever, I'm kinda busy right now, hope ya would come to the plain often. And...can ya make some comments about my poems, dude?
     
  4. logean

    logean C O N T R A

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    @Kanone: as you know, poetry in our education system is boring somehow, they don't teach how to make poem so i feel like a dumbass when i started wanting to write something T_T
    For poem i think we should use English, it can describe and express our feeling also emotion more precise.It's hard like hell for me to make a poem in
    Vietnamese :D
    Hope i will see your poem soon :D

    @RATfield:Of course i will, but i commented "The Fallen Warrior" when we chatted, have you forgotten ?
    I wrote "Regret" as a tribute for you, my friend.



    Regret

    My friend, why are you here again ?
    With your red eyes filled with pain
    Standing alone, under this heavy rain
    Was you waiting for someone to understand ?

    Betrayed heart, it's crying secretly
    Can you hold on a pain that hurt deeply ?
    Your flowers are stained with love
    As this regret burns forever in my blood

    A teardrop fall unto silence
    Kiss the wound with sweet endurement
    In your heart they are forgiven
    I cry and loath, for your innocence

    Your sacrifice it's never worth
    Who is alone and no one comfort?
    Your tears they never care
    Still longs for love through all despairs

    No longer i can stand by your side
    The door's opened, i saw the light
    I will be gone when the sun rise
    Let me last wipe these tears on your eyes

     
  5. Kanone

    Kanone Mario & Luigi

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    hell no,I disagree with your opinion.English is strict language but not as beautiful as vietnamese.
    :D
    My teacher procrastinate the assignment until next week so I would save the time for studying SAT:devil:.I promise that I would try next week.
     
  6. logean

    logean C O N T R A

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    language is just a tool, i feel kinda easier to write poem in English, and that's why i'm weird :D

    I guess your poem gonna finish in no time ;))
     
  7. Kanone

    Kanone Mario & Luigi

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    The fact speak louder the eloquent voice ;))

    I lived consistenly,
    As a king in my own world.
    I cheered up some people,
    Still,dissatisfied the others.
    There a profusion of entities in the life
    I did not realize.
    Living with my selfish happiness
    I thought this way was the best .
    Suddenly,one girl had came.
    She said :“Something is wrong”.
    It was the first time,
    I know how sweet the love is.
    And she helped me
    To realize how important the family is
    The sacred words I had forgotten for long time.
    Recognize more of that,
    In the days of studying abroad.
    She gave me the power to live
    To overcome all of the obstacles.
    For me,she is an angel.
    But suddenly,she disappeared.
    Leave me alone with my naïve dream.
    Where are you now,my angel?
    Your absence make my way untraceable
    Maybe one day I will laugh
    For my extreme ingenuousness.
    Maybe you are my special guest
    Step in then step out my life.
    How many times did I cry,
    With sorrow and regret in the night?
    Who will see my try,
    Except for my parents.
    Nowadays,I live with my passion.
    You know that I’m too stubborn
    To face the reality of the life.
    Because I always wish you would return
    To make my daydream come true.
    I never give up my hope.
    I saw many beautiful girls
    But no one can be as beautiful as you
    In both appearance and mind through my life.
    I love you !
    I will live arrogantly and innocently
    And dare the ravages of time
    To testify my love.

    I did that before I have to add the imaginer,5 senses into this poem.
    And I'm hunger for the comments.
     
  8. logean

    logean C O N T R A

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    Well then, no more Mr. nice guy ;))

    Frankly, i see something like this is not very good for a poem

    NO TITLE !??

    It really does help us alot, you know :D

    And the length could be considered...nice, quite enjoyable when you read the whole story step by step in each verse.However, the way you use the words is too "bare" for me :D, it's mean... like when you want to say something you say it out, it's not make me thinking, you know.

    In the other hand, if this is the very first poem you wrote, i'd like to say it's impressive :wink:

    I'd rate this nameless poem 3/5 :D and that's how it is.
     
  9. Kanone

    Kanone Mario & Luigi

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    :hug:
    You know
    I want to add some symbolism into this poem
    But I think that maybe my teacher don't know much about our way of thinking.It is part of different culture.
    I can't use easily figuretive meaning.The last time when I wrote some novels,with some symbolism,the teacher just don't get it.
    And when I read some transcendentalism poem,I can't find any symbolism too.
    =((
    I'm supposed to write about my unresolved memory,and I wrote about my first love.
    :hug: I will ask the teacher to help me add some more nghĩa ngầm vào đây.
    ::) nah,it is my second poem.
    thx u a lot
    can I ask how long did you study english?
    I'm really impressive about your poems
    sometimes,I have time and read some of your poems in here.THe more I read,the more I ;;)
     
  10. logean

    logean C O N T R A

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    Shame on me, i only learn English for a couple of years...and even failed one years at my academy.

    My poems are mostly crap :D, thanks a lot for telling me it's have some little value :hug:

    Still, i wanna make some incestuous relationship poems, it's more intriguing, don't you think so ? Or it's taboo to write stuff like that ? ::(
     
  11. RATField

    RATField Fire in the hole! GVN Veteran

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    Endless Infernum in One
    (Inspired from my fic : Events of Death : The Second Event : Endless Infernum)

    "Steel thy soul, the fallen one"
    "As there's no hope from anywhere
    Scene of dark depths bestowed his eyes
    No escape for a Fallen One."


    "Tere would be thou on this cliff"
    "No stairs, no wings nor hopes can reach me
    Thy shall fall far therfaith sky
    No way out for the liar of death"


    "No ones be with thou, liar"
    "Just as me respected no others but selves
    There's no truth in any lies would take
    No reasons why the liar be excused"


    "Tis is why, thy soul's caged
    As there's no wings for yi to fly
    End the dark in the endless truth
    Me fear not the blame of thou"


    "No truth, no lies, no even fate
    Not known why just truth is good"

    "In the thy shall good bad nor lie
    Yi can learn nothing from Infernum"


    "Steel thy soul, till thou fear not
    nei obvilion nor hell, the Lost Thou"

    "No ending for the glimpse of death
    Th'me escaped by ending my life"


    "Thy exists, the Soul of Steel
    W'ere no lives k'an kover the th'ruth"

    "Scene of death wouldn't be escaped itself
    There's no death for a truly soul"


    "Te shoul of death, te after life
    Thou creates ways for thyself loot
    Where no words changes the freedom thy
    Yis free fo al eternity"

    "When all chains are gone shot
    Would thy soul blessed by th'me
    Turning back from all the past
    Yi say love me, for eternity"


    "I the divine one of yours
    Shall bestow you nothing but love
    There's no stop for evelasting love
    No truth or lies can break in

    For that you've tried so hard to speak
    The Human's tongue you hate
    I shall bless you with tis
    I love you so much, my dear."
     
  12. logean

    logean C O N T R A

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    Dude i really can't see any points of your poem, you should at least let us read your fiction once so the poem would be more comprehensive.

    Until now i can say "Fallen Warrior" is your best poem so far, it's more emotional and stronger than any poem of yours i've ever seen :x

    I hope you can come up with something else in a near future. :wink:

    My latest melancholy


    Sadistic Ballad

    For the snowflake melt at dawn
    Of beauty never be astounded
    What remained on the auric sky
    Was the sound of your echoed cry

    White nights of never ending dream
    Fading slowly in moonlight beam
    This wine glass of tears taste so bitter
    I was banished from Eden forever

    We were the tempests that spinned
    For each other we vowed to lean
    Our dance changed the sky's color
    Through day and night, everlasting fire

    Enchantress, rise your sadistic ballad
    Of love and happiness that never last
    Despite a honest heart, faithful soul
    Nothing we can treasure, only sorrow

    So long i've wondered in silence
    Between us was it no difference ?
    Hearts longs for love, soul fear of pain
    As if fate, our end still be the same

    Gazing alone at the blackened sky
    Will there be a star for me to find ?
    All i have here is your heartless song
    The sadistic ballad for the time has gone​
     
  13. RATField

    RATField Fire in the hole! GVN Veteran

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    The more ya read it, the more part it will reveal before ya eyes. I had never made any poem without a buncha story and idea.

    I mean, ya would understand all of it without my fic :D

    Just that words of Felstanmia is hardly human's tongue, and voice of Tastar, the one hunting her is of a truly fallen warrior still trying to lie her in order to kill her. Their last confontation took place in Endless Infernum, which created by Mind, so can be changed by mind of ones being in it. One without courage, will fall to bottomless hole of Abyss.

    In the end, they fell in love with each other.

    The only things I didn't mention in the poem is their names, and the tales of Endless Infernum. Though, Endless Infernum exists in myth, I thought ya should've known about it.
     
  14. logean

    logean C O N T R A

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    I'm also not expecting people to understand what i'm talking about in my poem, cuss it's all coming out from my head and it's the thing only i know what it mean 100%.Somehow when the reader understand 50% i'm totally happy, but i'm not happy now cuss i only get 40% from your poem ::(



    Was not right, neither wrong

    Was not right, neither wrong
    We're apart for our hearts were not strong
    Why so fast, like a storm
    We breath even our hearts were painfully torn

    This eternal misery is my life
    And these tears find nowhere else to hide
    We were hurt, deep inside
    May i doubt that can we ever comfortably die ?

    Can the blade end this regret ?
    The remorse beat i shall rip out from my chest
    Memories that i will never forget
    To recall, i have no more peace to rest

    My soul, the broken window
    Outside the dark cloud rise for tomorrow
    Weeping alone, young crow of sorrow
    Wish it didn't burn down the precious meadow

    Was not right, neither wrong
    Now our hearts are old and forlorn
    We can't cry, but silently mourn
    To the grave, these pain will forever be gone​
     
  15. logean

    logean C O N T R A

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    For her everlasting faith


    Too cruel to die

    Are you not my king, merciful husband ?
    Why you put me into this executing dark prison?
    My love for you was condemned as treason
    Despite i threw my life to draw out the poison

    You used to whisper in my ears with ardent passion
    Vowed to love me no matter what happen
    Now I'm crying for your hand and being beaten
    You turned and walked away, was my blood forsaken ?

    His love song was for me but i didn't listen
    Death may prove my heart is clean and golden
    Will you save me at the last moment?
    When the blade take my head to eternal silence

    They drag me out when the sky was enlightened
    Aurora shares with me the pain of no fair judgment
    As the glimpsed light glitters from afar heaven
    Too weak to save a faithful heart of innocence

    "You will never remember but please kiss me goodbye
    For that to recall our time on my lonely paradise
    To stop these tears are flowing from my darkened eyes
    Please hold me one last time before the morning arise
    You may kill me with the reason i can never find
    But it's too cruel to die without you by my side
    Leave my dead body for the dog if you like
    To live as you please it's long been decided
    You're my only man, please don't make me cry
    After the blade fall, there maybe no one care for you tonight"​
     
  16. logean

    logean C O N T R A

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    And the rain falling again and again

    "A canary which lost her soul...
    Ohh how awful, she bears such sorrow
    Feathered heart can no longer lift
    On the ground alone she weep
    A canary with her wings 're bleeding
    Sails to the sky she was belonging
    In the middle of my sleepless night
    The mournful breeze was so lonely as her cry..."

    My dear, why you listen to this song?
    With my love can't your sadness be gone?
    You're not lost, also bleeding
    Somehow it was me, feared and crying

    "And the rain falling again and again
    Softly as a teardrop of her endless pain
    Winter has covered all traces to the sky
    To the utter void she whispers and crys
    Asking the stars why he left her behind
    But his warmth still lingers in her mind
    Now she has found a new shelter
    Until death, she will wait for him forever..."

    Every nights when we are close in bed
    Your body was here but nothing less
    To where outside you're staring
    It's cold and dark, for whom you're waiting ?

    "And the rain falling again and again..."

    Forevermore...
     
  17. logean

    logean C O N T R A

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    Mother

    Tonight i'm leaving mother Earth
    I betrayed her for mistress Venus
    Marching through the fierce darkened sky
    Alone and cold, i merely close my eyes
    I fear so much for what will be
    If a new home have the endless sea
    A deep blue sky like my mother's eye
    And the sweet love i can never find

    In dream, her words remind me kindly:
    "Child, when you're sad just run back to me
    I always here for you to see
    My heart grows old without your hug
    Like i did before, when you was hurt
    Years were dashing faster than a flash
    One day, you flied away from me so fast
    Wherever you go, i will be waiting
    For i know, you will return for me and crying..."

    Awake and my eyes filled with tears
    Why i was so cold when she stayed near?
    Her hands save my life so many times
    To raise me, she was cursed and damned
    No longer mother can stand by my side
    I regret until the last day of this life
    Now where i can find her again?
    To scream i need her so much, before the end

    In my nameless grave, her voice's rising:
    "Dear, why did you cry?
    You must be tricked and suffered outside
    By your best friends and your beloved
    Through your eyes i can say how painful it hurts
    Too many scars in your lonely soul
    Forgive yourself, it's only sorrow
    My lullaby will wipe away all your sadness
    To paradise you must peacefully rest..."

    Mother, i'm the worst awful shame
    But your love for me still remains the same
    Tonight i lay down slowly on your bosom
    My withered heart once again can be blossomed
    How long has it been to feel this sensation?
    Love in this cold world was long forbidden
    You're the Earth and fatally contaminated
    It's my greed that torn you and penetrated

    "Child, i gave birth for you to end my life..."

    -Mother-​
     
  18. logean

    logean C O N T R A

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    Rock, rap and rhyme

    For my sake


    Flowers, gift and poems for the lady
    In exchange I only have my misery
    So pitiful that my pride is lower than love
    Will it be worthy if I'm the one who's getting hurt

    The battle constantly wage within
    Need to realize that I have to give up fighting
    So tired, too much pressure in my life
    I lost the shame even I'm being defied

    Like god tell me what to do
    "Make them respect you !"
    Like it's the end of my faith
    When I realized nothing left for my sake

    It's not a romantic play of Shakespeare
    Lovers they always bond through many tears
    Those bitters drop I took all alone
    It's not that simple to let it all gone

    "I told you many times my feeling aren't fake
    When your eyes move I trembled and shake
    But still it wasn't not enough to make a sense
    Why you have to turned your back and defensed
    A mistake would be a stain, might it be?
    Then, I would better make you see"

    I should cremate what I live to treasure
    For its ashes would be my eternal pleasure
    Look, I'm not what you think
    Once again I felt the perfect bliss from burning​
     
  19. logean

    logean C O N T R A

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    Dear sis Cruel

    Thanks for fulfilling my request of closing my previous poetry topic, because I haven't had enough time for poem, now I'm free and wild so I'm into this stuff again ^^, I hope you won't feel piss off because I open the second poetry topic just to satisfy myself, I also want to see some nice poems from everyone too, of course.
    This time I decide to keep this topic forever, even I'm gonna be busy like hell soon :D.


    Dear reader and pals: we are gonna release our rhythmical flow and the ardent passion, right ?

    Let me be the first ^^


    For My Love

    I woke up and can't remember
    Is it a last day of December ?
    Falling the first snow of my winter
    With my eyes laid on this love letter

    Is sadness brings this winter breeze?
    How many tears have fallen within me
    Will you be there for me to see?
    Or like the tides that fade eventually...?

    For my love, this poem will be a wind
    I wish its warmth would bring you the spring
    And the eternal winter, will remain here
    Within my heart, alone in fear

    I woke up and cant remember
    Is it our last day together?
    Could this be why I'm feeling withered?
    When I knew nothing could last forever​
     
  20. cruelshade

    cruelshade Garena VN

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